When you never know if you’re going to see something crazy pop up in the news, sometimes it’s still surprising, and yet totally unsurprising, when certain things pop up in the news.

Today’s surprisingly unsurprising thing is that racist-ass former Maricopa County, AZ sheriff Joe Arpaio, fresh off his being pardoned by our multiple bun-less McDonald’s filet-o-fish consumer in chief for assorted rasist-ass shit he did as sheriff, is going to run for senate to replace Jeff Flake, who is not seeking reelection in 2018, because he was ostracized by the GOP for daring to criticize Trump on topics other than his fast food habits.

Arpaio is running in the Republican primary against, among others, former Arizona state senator Kelli Ward, who also loves her some Trump, in what will surely be a contest of who can say more stupid ridiculous shit about how much they like Trump.

So now the rest of the country gets to sit back and hope that yet another deep red state doesn’t elect an objectively awful—for reasons unrelated to any choice of political party—candidate who happens to run as a Republican, in what will surely be too close of a race.

Dammit Joe Arpaio, we just got done with that shit with creepy-ass Roy Moore. Remember him? The guy who cruises the mall for teenage girls and responded to claims that he was racist against black people and anti-Semitic by trotting out his wife to say they can’t be racist against black people because they have black friends, and they can’t be anti-Semitic because they have one Jewish attorney (who, turns out, actually converted first to Mormonism and is now an evangelical Christian)?


Roy Moore only barely lost because a whole lot of white people in Alabama just, oh fuck, here’s a graph because I don’t have anything nice to say about white people in Alabama other than a lot of them voted for Roy Moore.

I have 3% more faith in the white people of Arizona to not elect Joe Arpaio than I did in the white people of Alabama to not elect Roy Moore, and the white people in Alabama voted a hell of a lot for Roy Moore. Thankfully a whole lot of other people voted for Doug Jones. With any luck there are enough minorities in Arizona who show up and show out against Arpaio for all the shit he was racist about.