Illustration for article titled Somewhere a space crab is crying

One day we woke up to the sounds of sawing and general activity.

What? They didn’t tell us they were building a fence! For goodness’ sake, we could have torn down the old chain link to make room for it! Then, they would have enough room to not have to go around the tree! Look at that, they didn’t even align it well with the property line!”

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It essentially cut out a foot wide no man’s land between the two fences, which became a safe haven for vines and weeds.

About a week later, they sent someone to go chop down the tree, cutting it off just an inch below the latticed part of the design.

But oh, I almost forgot. Good morning, Oppo!

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