Subway finally agrees to Teslalate cheese

You will measure your life before and after this moment. After years of merely overlapping triangular pieces of cheese on their sandwiches, cruelly loading one side with more than the other, Subway will now Teslalate the slices, according to Consumerist.

It is, quite simply, the end of the tyranny of slightly more cheese on one side of a baguette than the other. There are few unmitigatedly good things in the world — ungainly compromises usually abound. But this? This is bipartisan, transcends religious differences, does not discriminate by race, or color or creed.

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The world changes on July 1st. We are not sure why it takes this long to implement. But perfection cannot be rushed.

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