Here at Jalopnik, we hate crossovers. They are stupid vehicle driven by stupid people. They are ugly, inefficient, inherently flawed and they make us want to kill baby Pandas. Crossovers are like seafood; they are disgusting but some variety are a bit less repulsive. Popcorn shrimps for example aren’t that repulsive when dipped in Miracle Whip ..
So let’s looks at 10 of the popcorn shrimps in miracle whip of crossovers.
10 - Dodge Nitro
Inspired design and Jeep DNA, it stands out.
9 - Ford Flex
Basically a modern Buick Roadmaster wagon
8 - Tesla Model X
Tesla is bringing the low belt-line design back, plus you can play with the cool doors while you can’t use it because it’s charging.
7 - Volvo XC60 Polestar
Polestar, do I need to say more ?
6 - Saab 9-4X
Superior Swedish design and engineering, Unicorn status
5 - Mazda CX-7
Only a few inches and a manual transmission away from the elusive Mazdaspeed6 wagon of our dreams
4 - Mazda CX-3
An Inspired KODO design dipped in Mazda’s racing DNA
3 - Mercedes GLA45 AMG
Only for the wing and the decals
2 - Mazda CX-5
The Miata of crossovers
1 - Volvo XC90
The new XC90, when compared to its lousy competition, is a bit like Bono compared to the signer of Nickelback, clearly not in the same league.