This is the only picture that I took myself. I actually waited around the parking lot for about twenty minutes hoping to catch the owner of this perfect (except for the broken antenna) kitty, but they didn’t appear.

After a long day of work, I decided to relax with my go-to Tsingtao crappy beer and some other less crappy but pretty crappy beer from Iceland. After a day of being a productive member of society (insofar as I’m not on the dole), I find it relaxing to think of all the bad decisions I want to make. I should preface this by saying that these are bad decisions, not cars that I want that would be a good decision (Like an XK120)

n.b., hard top and soft top XJS are two different entries.


SAGE. It’s BRG’s classy older brother.
I actually saw one of these unicorn Jagons on Craigslist, in this color, for sale in Camden, NJ, the city that only avoids being the mirder capital of the US by virtue of having a small population. It was $5k, and probably a mess. I still regret not following up on it.


This is a crappy wrap, but I can’t find a good photo of a BRG XK.


In all fairness, I don’t know that a street legal 6r4 is a bad decision, but it can’t not be, right? Also, it’s not even a rally car with an illustrious record.

I realize that this list is British heavy, but that’s because the British make cars that are simultaneously wonderful and terrible. For the sake of fairness, here are some none British cars that I would like to ruin me financially:

I don’t know enough about Volvos to know that this is unreliable, I just assume so.


There’s a Richard Pryor movie that I saw as a kid—Moving Day?—in it, he has a 900 and I thought it was the coolest thing ever.
I wish Audis were still boring looking with stupid horsepower. Current Audi does nothing for me.


Out of all of these, the most realistic purchases are as follows:

XK8, because I already have an XJ8, which for cost reasons was basically an XK8 on a longer body, so it’s a known quantity.

MGB, because it would never be a DD, and doesn’t take up much space of it doesn’t run.


X-Type Jagon, because they’re cheap, even if there are never more than two for sale in the US at any given time.

Some form of Land Rover or Range Rover. When I was a kid, my mom had a Montero. I have no memories at all of being in it when it was on the road, but I vividly remember playing in and on it with friends and pretending to shift it. So, even if I buy one and it never runs again, I feel like I could my money’s worth out of sitting in it and pretending to shift.