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The truth is, Wyllis, they just ain't that bad anymore. With the exception of the last few, any one of them is better by far than a swift kick in the ass, or the daily beaters most of us drove just five years ago. Hell, those first few are just downright flirty, and I'd sure as shit take them for a dance on a curvy old back road. Having driven two of the above, I'm actually confident that they can make a solid showing of themselves, too.

Seriously, all those little hot hatches from the 80s, 90s, and early aughts that we claim to love so much aren't half the car that some of these are. In fact, like the the Baby Boomer generation and their muscle cars, Millenials like myself are starting to get once-upon-a-time-get-the-fuck-off-my-lawn syndrome. We keep thinking that cars like the original Civic Si, B16 Sentras, T200 Celicas, etc. were all great cars that were way better than anything that is put out today. And the truth is, they were the best; but only of their time. Ten or more years later, midsize family cars relegated to Starbucks runs can keep up with those old buckets.

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I'd actually be curious to see Motor Trend, Car & Driver, Road & Track, Automobile, etc. (or even Jalopnik or Top Gear UK) put a contemporary family sedan like the Fusion or the Mazda 6 against sports cars from the late 90s that we all claim to know and love. I think the results would surprise many a reader and many an enthusiast.

I don't know about you lot, but there are definitely a few picks above that I wouldn't necessarily kick out of bed. Unless, of course, the following came along: