Gambling must pay off when you do it like every weekend because a few months back, my girls dad won a brand new 2017 Jaguar XE from the local casino. All he had to do was go down to the local Jag dealer and pick out his color and pay the taxes on it when the time came. He ended up choosing a black on black 35t Prestige. Sticker on it was damn near $50 grand.

He comes and visits with my son every single Sunday so I asked him while they hung out could I take it for a drive for like an hour. I was honestly scared too because 1. he intimidates the hell out of me and 2. he garages the thing and only brings it out on the weekends or for family trips. But surprisingly he said sure but told me to be careful with a look that said “i’ll fuck you up if you scratch it”. He always has that look though.

He didn’t let me take a picture of the interior because “its not clean” according to him. Even though he drives it maybe twice a week.

Looks wise inside and out, its a looker and in line with the rest of the Jaguar lineup. I really like the rotary shiftier and the black gloss trim, though that has the tendency to get finger prints on it and could be scratch prone. I didn’t care for the infotainment system either and found the screen to be too small, something that didn’t fit with the rest of the high end feel of the car.


I ended up taking the car on some good driving roads around Lake Matthews out in Riverside County to get a good feel for the car and to see if it was a good competitor to the other sports sedans in the segment, namely the 3 Series and the ATS. I have to say that I was thoroughly surprised. The chassis was composed and cornered well and flat. I didn’t feel unsure about taking a curve at 50 like I thought I would have been.


The engine though is what makes the car. I believe (?) its shared with the F Type and it makes 340 horses while getting decent combined mileage of 24. It pulls strong and sounds great while doing so. Sports car like, especially in something like a tunnel or a freeway on ramp.

Reluctantly I returned the car to him before he injured me. It made me sad that as surprisingly good as it is, his sits in the garage most of the week. But thanks to that sweet sweet depreciation, maybe one day in the near future I can pick one of these up on the cheap. That is if haunting memories of how bad my S-Type R were don’t stop me.