Welcome to The Morning Sh*t! Everywhere you go, always take the weather with you.
1st Wipe: In news that’s sure to surprise exactly nobody, Mercedes is now in the hot seat over multiple Diesel emissions defeat codes. Internal company emails included engineers asking about legality of the code, but engineers haven’t been important to Mercedes for over 20 years.
2nd Wipe: The UAW-FCA scandal continues, with many seeing it as an opportunity to clean house within the UAW and get back to its core values: Paying workers three times the prevailing local wage to slowly inflate housing prices over multiple generations while building mediocre cars for ignorant flag wavers.
3rd Wipe: GM considering offering a debt-equity swap to South Korea in exchange for the Korean government providing tax incentives to help keep their domestic plants open. Your Econ 101 professor was wrong all along – government does have a place in international trade.
4th Wipe: Massive potential tariffs on imported steel could spike the price of cars, in turn hurting the domestic steel industry as overall demand cools. Your Econ 101 professor was right all along — but voters hain’t got time to listen to that kind of book learning when we have an America that needs to be made great again.
5th Wipe: Hyundai to begin selling hydrogen fuel cell crossover in South Korea this month, which also includes a time travel feature that allows it to compete with Toyota from 10 years ago.
Flush: Seinfeld’s “Pothole” episode first aired today in 1997. Comfort lanes? Holy cow!