This is the Nismo Patrol, a performance version of Nissan’s venerable off roader. However, instead of doing something sensible like making it perform even better off road Nismo went the route of attempting to make this lumbering 6000lb SUV be fast around a track.

Granted, Land Rover kinda pulled it off with the RR Sport SVR but that is smaller in every dimension and way lighter than this behemoth.

I can’t escape the feeling that is a cynical ploy to appeal to wealthy and tasteless Emiratis who must have the latest and greatest versions of their vehicles.