I have uncovered the secret to being big on Oppo.

Your Kinja name needs to be one word, followed by three numbers. The first part of the word needs to be some conveyance of entertainment. The second needs to be a domestic animal. Then three numbers should follow.

Next, your post should be about some sort of flying machine that goes reeeaally fast, like super-duper-ultra-mega fast.

So there we have it. My new Kinja name will be "PlaystationGoldfish420", and my post shall be about a Boeing 2707.