It is time. Citizens, maintain calm during this transition. It is not what was expected, but it is what we deserve. I hereby declare....

SEBCON 5. SEBCON 5 IS IN EFFECT. THE SRIRACHA IS ON THE BAGEL, REPEAT, THE SRIRACHA IS ON THE BAGEL. ANY HONDA OR TOYOTA PRODUCTS AND ENTHUSIASTS THEREOF ARE IN IMMEDIATE DANGER. I RECOMMEND YOU ENGAGE VTEC AND VVT-I HYBRID FUCKING WHATEVER YOU HAVE AT THE EARLIEST OPPORTUNITY AND COUNTERSTRIKE TO USE THE CONFUSION TO YOUR ADVANTAGE. THE CANADIANS ARE ANGRY, AND THE JERSEY SHORE HAS STAGED A HOSTILE TAKEOVER. THE MODS WILL BE WIELDING THE BANHAMMER WITHOUT REGARD FOR COLLATERAL DAMAGE IN AN ULTIMATELY FUTILE ATTEMPT TO PUT THIS THING DOWN. RUN FOR THE HILLS. SAVE THE MANUALS!!