What is the sound of one piston slapping?
What is the sound of one piston slapping?
Illustration for article titled Things I want to say to dealers but dont....part 2

Excerpt from actual chat window conversation. Name of salesperson and client have been edited. I have my commentary in bold for your enjoyment. (picture somewhat related)


Nissan Dealer: Hello, this is First, Last, how may I help you?

-Hi my name is Tom I am with Automatch Consulting. I have a client interested in a Rogue AWD SL w/premium package.


Do you have a direct email in case this chat window decides to crash? (they do that often). You can contact me at 609-798-1601 or AutomatchConsulting@gmail.com

Nissan Dealer: sorry I was just talking to manager in your case

(This means they don't want to deal with me)

Nissan Dealer: SL are hard to get

(Bullshit, there are plenty in the area)

Nissan Dealer: we are working with clients in the showroom with Sl in stock otherwise hard to find them


(Again they would like me to go away)

-It seems you have 5 on your website. My customer will be in your area tomorrow for test drives at Honda and Toyota. I would like to tell her to stop by but I need some pricing to do that.


Nissan Dealer:let me check again

(Oh, now you are interested)

-Here are some stock numbers if that helps 60092 60352 60360

(Because I have to do your job for you)

Nissan Dealer: ok he (the manager) asked are you looking for fee on top of pricing?


-No, I do not charge dealerships a fee. My fee is paid by the customer. All I am looking for is the best price. I have quotes from 3 other Nissan dealers but you are the closest for my customer.

Nissan Dealer: ok pls give me couple mins

- No problem

Nissan Dealer: can you narrow down exact one?

- Sure stock #60092

Nissan Dealer: ok

- I'm going to need that quote emailed to me when you get a chance. That way I can forward it to my customer. This makes things easier for you and them.


Nissan Dealer:that would be great ..this vehicle is a special buy and the discount and price Can Not be duplicated $30795

(That discount sucks)

-I'm not sure I follow you on the can not be duplicated part.

Nissan Dealer: this was a special purchase from Nissan it's a Auto Show vehicle if your client switches to another vehicle we can not match the discount


- So if she chooses an identical SL with the same package and the same MSRP the other car will be more expensive?

Nissan Dealer: yes

(Really bro? First, that discount sucks because everyone else already has you beat by at least $700. Second, that is some bullshit that you can't at least give me the same sucky discount on an identical car)


-Gotcha. Ok, then would you mind sending me that price via email with the VIN on that car?

(I really don't even care at this point and I'm just being nice. I have already decided my client will buy elsewhere. But I don't want her to get the cold shoulder when she goes for a test drive)


Nissan Dealer: also

Nissan Dealer: 99% of delaerships have addttional markup over msrp -we dont

(Really? Do you even internet bro? That is why you are giving a weak-ass discount because you are under some delusion that all the other dealers have crazy markups over MSRP. This is a compact crossover not some rare sports car. My Subaru people are pulling at least 3 grand off sticker without blinking an eye and that is the top rated crossover in the class)


- Not from what I've seen on '14 Rogues

Nissan Dealer: you been in their stores?

-I have the price quotes compared to the MSRP. It doesn't matter much to me what is in their store.


Nissan Dealer: well they don't tell people till they get there...happen to several of clients who bought here

(So your customers clearly are not smart enough to shop around on the web before buying a car, no wonder you don't want to deal with me)


Nissan Dealer: so if you can Email you client I send you the details


- Yes please email me the details of that vehicle to AutomatchConsulting@gmail.com and I will gladly forward it along.


Nissan Dealer: do I get clients name info too?

(That's not how it works bro)

-Not until I get the pricing and she decides she wants to buy from you.

Nissan Dealer: the only way i get credit is if clients name is in my data base before she walks in


-You can have her name. First Last

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