Re-evaluated career choices.

Had an ex-girlfriend offer to pay airfare to spend three weeks with her in China.


Did not go to China, because that’s a very bad idea.

Bought a poncho.

It was from L.L. Bean. I’m still cool.

Felt powerless to help a friend who is being psychologically abused.

Reconnected with an ex girlfriend who I stopped talking to because she’s Satan incarnate.


Went wedding shoe shopping with a different friend, angling to be a male bridesmaid.

Found out Wegmans no longer has a mini kosher deli, now has a kosher freezer.

Remembered exactly why I was sure my ex was Satan incarnate.

Pondered the point of life when I don’t have easy access to Russ and Daughters and no longer can find belly lox.


Maybe one day if I keep my fingers crossed friend to whom I shall be a bridesmaid suggests I make an online dating profile.

Drink alcohol. Make dating profile.

Get 30 messages in two days.

Realize that I do not need dating profile, but feel bad about making one, since I prefer to creep on people in person and did not respond.


Gasket leak on Jag.

Got a job I am in no way qualified for.

Still considered making a JDate profile, because I’m all about desperate frums.

Bought a new pair of expensive driving loafers.

Did not make JDate profile. Still all about that frum life.

Accepted gasket leak, because the transmission is a goner.

Considered writing down an account of all the weird shit I’ve ever gotten myself into.


May fix gaskets if bored.

Came to weird realization that I am either very lucky, or somehow get rewarded for always trying my best to do good, despite being very lazy and never bothering with anything. Questioned whether I’m actually a Taoist at heart.


Consulted I Ching.

Bought a pair of Nantucket reds.

Living that Take Ivy life.

Pretty sure everything is always okay.

Posted on Oppo.

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