Many of us fear the fate of our country as we come down to less than 12 hours until ballots officially open. So to lighten things up a bit, I decided car culture should get its own taste of politics, but all for just shits and giggles. I’m sure many of us are curious as to what Donald Trump’s car equivalent might be. Hillary Clinton’s? Tonight, I’ll be making that decision, but you live in America, goddammit. If you feel differently in any way, feel free to comment on what you think each candidate’s car equivalent might be.
DONALD TRUMP- FORD BRONCO II
You know the kinds of people who drive DANGER RANGERS. They seem to politically allot with Trump. In fact, I have not met a single democrat who drove a Ford Ranger ever in my life. The Bronco II was basically the Ranger SUV, and like the Trump Train, it was a very flawed vehicle. It was prone to flipping. Need I say more? (Actually, yes, because full-sized Broncos were also used as border patrol vehicles in the nineties)
HILLARY CLINTON- CADILLAC DEVILLE (w/ 500ci V8)
One word—lies. If it’s one thing Hillary’s notorious for, it’s lying her ass off about just about everything. And while the 1975-1976 DeVille didn’t really lie to the American consumer, it certainly did deceive them into thinking that they were getting the most powerful land-yacht they could get their hands on. The car did come with an 8.2 liter V8, That big of a displacement wouldn’t reach showroom floors until the Viper trotted along. It seems convincing that under that hood, you would be getting the power of an entire battalion of derby-winning horses thrusting the Caddy forward. But alas, 210hp was all you got. An ATS puts out more power than that today.
So, what do you think? Remember, if you have a car in mind, don’t be afraid to share in the comments!