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Two for the Weekend from Philly(ish) Craigslist.

Ok maybe these two are from the “nearby areas” but are you not entertained?

Example 1 - If u want to own ur city this is the car for u: This seller appears to have taken a 2006 Dodge Charger that has been turned into a thing that used to be a 2006 Dodge Charger, complete with “lambo doors” and 28 “floaters.” This is what happens when you leave your phone plugged in to the charger for too long:

Illustration for article titled Two for the Weekend from Philly(ish) Craigslist.
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I’d quote the description, but you really need it in it’s entirety. Also the seller has abstained from using any punctuation, making it difficult to separate one phrase from the next. So there’s that. Bask in its glory:

“60,050 miles on Dodge charger r/t on 28’s Dub Floaters Flashes custom ostrich seats hemi fully customize from wheels to the interior to the trunk had 4 12s in the trunk took them out put in 2 12’s speakers to much Bass customize keys was 450 dollars to much spend customize dash with like 10 or11inch tv’s ac unit is in the glove box glove department has push to start on keys front driver and passenger door are lambo doors also equipped with K&N airtake system so its not your regular hemi if u want to own your city this is the car for u call for more question or info”

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https://delaware.craigslist.org/cto/5294834579… (emphasis added)

Example 2 - WTFMPL-Approved 1988 Ford Ranger: On a more serious note, I’ve been struggling for reasons not to get this jazz-themed Ford Ranger. It’s simultaneously more flamboyant and more masculine than I could ever pull off. Meaner and nicer than the than the bro-iest bro truck in Jersey. I mean, holy shit:

Illustration for article titled Two for the Weekend from Philly(ish) Craigslist.
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That’s like (heavy emphasis on the “like” here) the coolest thing I’ve ever seen and I thank God I don’t have six grand right now. I absolutely would not have the discipline to prevent myself from buying it. Rule over everything. https://cnj.craigslist.org/cto/5294400438…

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