1. Don’t park your van on the only loading ramp at the warehouse and then disappear for half an hour. The E-series and I were stuck outside for way too long. (Side note: I passed by a major head-on crash that was the result of a police chase shortly after, so... Maybe he inadvertently saved my life. Or screwed me out of the best dashcam video I’ll ever get...)

2. Don’t mount your trailer hitch directly to your bumper. I have no idea how it hasn’t been torn off yet.