Ugh, I Actually Like That Pokémon Go Frappuccino

Pictured: These people having good overpriced fluff-drinks, and Rally Chicken hanging out with a framed photo of Richard Nixon.

Ordering something with two #brands for a name kind of makes me feel dumb. That ridiculous Pokémon Go Frappuccino is delicious, though, and I feel kind of stupid admitting it.

I think the part that rubs me the wrong way is that Starbucks didn’t give it a real name. It’s not a Razz Berry Frappuccino, based on the in-game items that likely prompted them to put buttloads of tasty berry stuff in the drink. It’s not even something more normal like a Berry Surprise Funtime For Your Mouth Hole. No, it’s the friggin’ Pokémon Go Frappuccino.


I had to roll through the drive-thru in the Lancer, the Tire Annihilator™, quietly sigh in despair at what life has become, and ask, “Do you guys still have that Pokémon Go Frappuccino?” all while facepalming at myself on the inside, as there was no Pokémon Go drink advertised on the menu boards for the drive-thru. (I would have felt slightly less dumb if it had been listed. Slightly. Maybe.)

I mean, kudos to the Pokémon Go team for making me feel like I’ve resigned myself to eating brand names instead of edible foodstuffs. It’s the most obvious of obvious tie-ins. To their credit, there was also an additional pokéstop added to the Starbucks for me to twirl for items while I waited.

But yeah, give the Berry Taste-a-Paloozaccino a real name next time so I feel less dumb. Thanks in advance.

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Stef Schrader

Contributor, Jalopnik. 1984 "Porschelump" 944 race car, 1971 Volkswagen 411 race car, 2010 Mitsubishi Lancer GTS.