UPDATE: I stopped at the shop that replaced my oil pan in October and asked about my broken dipstick. Of course they denied breaking it, but I certainly didn't do it. They didn't seem to be too concerned about the whole thing. They said it would be too heavy to get picked up, if it were even in there. They also said the screen over the oil pick up would block it.
I suggested doing an oil change but they said not to worry about it, but they would check it out with a scope next time. The shop turned down an $80 oil change, so I guess my car isn't in too much danger.
This whole situation is just way too weird and I feel like I'm the 1 person it would happen to in a million. Ordered a new dipstick online, I should have it by the end of the week.
I went home on my lunch break today after going to the grocery store. The weather is kind of nice, so I figured I'd pop the hood and see what's going on.
That is not what my dipstick is supposed to look like. The metal tip was clearly broken off and there was grey goop that looks like the gasket goop from when I had my oil pan replaced.
I really hope the other half isnt in there somewhere...
Also, my dog got into the Christmas gifts under the tree and ruined a bracelet my wife got her mother, so thanks for that, dog. Then I got back to work and curbed my front wheel. Like hard. Like chunk of sidewalk missing hard. I might be changing a tire in the parking lot. Today sucks balls.