UPDATE: I need to put this upfront and I need everybody to read this. I appreciate the offers but I want to be clear I have no thoughts of killing myself or harming others. Anyway, some cops came down to do a welfare check and now my mom is in extreme distress. She’s already feuding with my brother and with this it’s now made the situation worse. So please don’t do that.
I know, dramatic headline, so sue me. I just don’t fucking care anymore. I tried calling the National Suicide Prevention Hotline and my calls won’t go through, they keep getting dropped. So I have no one to talk to. Oh well, I guess literally going to Hell is my only escape.
I just wish someone or something had intervened and prevented me from being born in the first place.
Oh, and no, I’m not going to do harm to myself or others, but I am feeling desperate now. I know people have told me I shouldn’t go to Oppo for help on everything but when I can’t even contact the specialists for these type of things where the fuck else am I supposed to go?
EDIT: a number of you have stated that I shouldn’t kill myself because it would devastate my friends and family. Well, my family is acting like a bunch of raging bitches and my so-called “friends” are mocking me for it so to be honest with you suicide would only give me further incentive to spite them.