“Your husband really should get a newer car,” my wife’s friend told her when she saw my beigemobile. Really? Really?

Something rear wheel drive then. Manual.

Well, no. Something more practical.

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Yes, now we’re talking. Wait ... 40 grand? I’d rather have an NSX ...

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Now we’re really talking. But I wouldn’t be able to drive it anywhere, mods are expensive, maintenance is a bitch, and you have to stop the car to remove the roof.

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But I have one of those already. I just don’t want to commute 3 hours a day in one. I need something squishy, automatic, and preferably something I don’t mind driving into the ground.

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Dammit.