Stress control is difficult for me.
I realize that, while I have done well with diet and exercise overa, I am not managing the stress part of my life very well lately.
I felt like I was doing well after the heart attack, but as I have been feeling stronger, I find myself falling back into old patterns. This is bad. A small example: I had a bad day yesterday. Took the Cressida for a short drive and it died in the road witb what appears to be a fuel delivery problem. This threw my whole schedule off.
I got back to my house, and managed to lock my Sunchaser keys in the trunk (no spare). This is a minor inconvenience in the grand scheme of things. It ultimately cost me $80 and five minutes with a locksmith. I have wasted $80 on dumber things than that.
But my reaction was entirely out of proportion. I allowed myself to get furious and entirely worked up over something totally stupid. I woke up this morning still cranky, and am already allowing minor annoyances to get under my skin.
I do think rage is a drug in a way, and some of us get off on the adrenaline of that fury as it builds and boils over. I am one of those, and it is the worst thing about me. I need to figure out how to not do this to myself any more. It can actually kill me.
Toby hates it. He gets very anxious if he sees me upset. Sorry for skipping the Sunchaser and dogs, but this is on my mind at the moment.