Which One Of You Loons Is This?

Searching Craigslist for “bmw wagon” as I so often do, I stumbled on this: It’s an Allroad, and it’s a manual! Well maintained! It’s been his wife’s DD for 6 years (I’ve also heard that line before). He starts listing off all the things that have been done recently, and names a few big ones, like air suspension pump, timing belt service, then this classic line: “Being a used car it does have some tinkering that could be done to it.”



I suppose that *could* mean, “has a few loose interior parts, and/or quirky things like the sunroof only opens when it’s above freezing.” But in this case, it more likely means, “Dash is lit up like a Christmas tree.”

The thing is, this guy doesn’t just have an Allroad that his wife has been driving. He’s got a problem. He’s no Ron Dauzet but he appears to have at least three, perhaps four Allroads right now, in addition to a V8 S4, all currently for sale. In one of the pictures, you can see another burgundy Allroad, but he’s only selling one of the burgundy ones, so it seems. Still, look at this:


One running, salvage title, for $1,700:


And one with no battery and a bad head gasket for $1,600 - yes, you read that right, he’s asking for money to be given to him for this car, rather than paying you, the soon-to-be-broke new owner:


It’s tough, because these cars are so cool. And they are capable of driving under their own power for several miles at a time - I mean, this one has 230k on it! So that says to me, someone has really put in the time and money to keep this thing working properly, to have covered all those miles. It also might just be time for round two (or three!) of all the usual issues. Maybe he’s made this one work by cannibalizing the rest of them?  

He’s also got an E46 in the pictures, so there’s that too.

It’s okay, you can admit it if this is you. Come on, we won’t judge.

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